Post by Starr on Aug 2, 2013 11:52:00 GMT -5
*The shot begins with a shaky handheld self-shot of Brett Starr walking down a hallway in his expansive mansion in the hills of Los Angeles.*
Brett Starr: Ladies and gentlemen of the Canadian X Pro Audience...I am very pleased to introduce you to the greatest wrestler the world has ever seen...
*Starr rotates the camera to a mirror that is hanging on the wall. Starr smirks and flexes the muscles on his free arm as he stands there is his bright pink speedo swimtrunks.*
Brett Starr: Me! Brett Starr!
*Brett Starr starts to make fake crowd going nuts sounds with his mouth.*
Brett Starr: BRETT STARR!!!!
*Brett starts to closes his eyes and spins around soaking in all the fans appreciation. Or at least the ones he hears in his own head. Brett starts a chant in hopes that "the crowd" will chime in.*
Brett Starr: Let's go Brett! Let's Go Brett! LET'S GO BRETT!
*The camera angle keeps spinning and it finds a blonde woman in her early twenties standing at the end of the hallway with her arms crossed and looking confused.*
Lindsey Starr: What are you doing, dumb ass?
*Brett stops suddenly and fumbles with the camera, almost dropping it on the ground.*
Lindsey Starr: And what did I tell you about wearing those ugly ass speedos? The last thing I want to see is my dip-shit brother wearing hot pink banana hammocks the first thing in the morning...Or any time in the day to be completely honest. It's already embarrassing enough to tell people that you are my brother.
Brett Starr: I-Well, uh....You could always tell them that your brother is the savior of the sport of professional wrestling! I mean, I am singlehandedly going up to Canada to save the sport in that country! You know they are always looking to America for handouts!
*Lindsey just shakes her head at his stupidity and turns to walk back to her bedroom.*
Lindsey Starr: Whatever...just keep it down. Some of us are still trying to sleep!
Brett Starr: I'm sure dad is proud of his baby girl sleeping until eleven AM on a Friday morning! Probably warms his heart!
*Lindsey keeps walking but calls back without missing a beat.*
Lindsey Starr: Probably as proud as he is in his deadbeat son who has invaded his pool house! Why don't you get an apartment or something?
*Brett turns the camera to his face that is red with embarrassment from that revelation being caught and he turns it off.*
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*The scene reopens with Brett Starr laying in the middle of an outdoor Olympic-sized pool on an inflate-able raft. The area is fenced in and palm trees are swaying as Starr is still rocking his hot pink speedos and a pair of black sunglasses. In his left hand he clutches an iPad that he is reading information off of.*
Brett Starr: So my opponent this week...The first man to fall to the greatness of Brett Starr is a man named Killgrave. Killgrave...the man who has a constant look of being constipated. I'm not sure I want to kick him in the gut because I am afraid of what will come out the back if I do...If you know what I am saying.
*Brett pulls his sunglasses down on the bridge of his nose.*
Brett Starr: CLEANUP...AISLE ONE!
*Brett chuckles at his own joke, which is good because there is no one else around (plus the fact that it wasn't that funny) before he pushes his glasses back up again and reads more into his opponent.*
Brett Starr: Killgrave has won 65 matches in his career! Damn, that is actually impressive if you remove the fact that none of them are against people of my caliber! Now I know what you are probably saying..."Brett, you haven't even had a match yet! How can you be so assured of your greatness when you have never been tested?"
First I would answer, Damn Dad! What don't you get off my back for a minute! Then I would say, don't you realize who I am? I am one of the greatest graduates of the Valour Training Academy! VALOUR...like our illustrious GM? That's right, he signed me because he saw that the sky was the limit for me!
I am a first round Hall of Famer...and I haven't even wrestled a match! I am a true prodigy and you all should be thanking the good lord above that you are getting the opportunity to see me wrestle my first match. For free none the less.
*Starr shakes his head and leans back further on the raft.*
Brett Starr: But back to the task at hand. Killgrave, my opponent has a lot of experience it seems. He has only lost five times and has only two draws. Which actually surprises me. When I see Killgrave I figured he is a huge draw. Flies must be drawn to him non-stop because he is so full of shit. Killgrave may have the look of a superstar but he doesn't have the talent and the charisma to pull it off.
When Killgrave comes out to the ring, all the fans promptly get up out of their seats and take the quickest route to the restroom, snack table or merchandise stands. But all of that changes in Halifax. Because he is facing the one and only, the always entertaining Highlight of any Night he is involved in, handsome, charismatic and just all around great guy Brett Starr!
*Starr smiles his million dollar smile after that statement before speaking again.*
Brett Starr: I have to admit that I am happy for Killgrave, for once he will actually get to wrestle in front of a captive audience. The only bad thing is everyone will finally be able to see what kind of crap sandwich he really is. But, that is not what I am here to talk about. Killgrave, I'm here to tell you exactly what is going to happen when we get in that ring.
*Brett takes off his sunglasses and tosses them behind him into the pool. Starr then closes the cover on his iPad and throws that into the pool as well, seemingly not caring that it will ruin the device completely.*
Brett Starr: I've heard all of the stories KG. I've heard that you have a problem with rookies. I mean, it's hard to miss it since it's right there in your damn bio on the website! Way to make yourself look like an asshole right off! That is really a good way to sell some of that merchandise!
But I'm here to tell you that it's alright you don't like me. I completely understand why you don't! Do you think that the dinosaurs liked the meteor that crashed into earth? Do you think the deer likes the hunter that shoots him? Do you think the antelope likes the lion that devours him? Of course not. You hate me and people like me...because you realize we are here to put you out of the business. Yeah, you have your spot. I'm sure Angelo blew all the smoke up your ass you could handle and sold you on how you will be a centerpiece of the company for the next few years and how he envisions you as the face of the future.
You know why I know that? Because he did the same to me. Don't believe me? Run the video!
*The scene fades into a hidden camera shot of Angelo Valour sitting behind his desk in his office. Starr seemingly has placed a camera on the lapel of his jacket without Valour's knowledge or permission.*
Angelo Valour: So Brett...This is a standard deal. You get paid per performance with an added bonus for every win you may have. If you are interested, we have a spot open on our debut card against Killgrave. I'm going to warn you, he is a great wrestler so you are going to have to bring it. But I've been keeping my eye on you for as long as you have been training at the academy and I think you have a bright future in this business. This is exactly the kind of match you need to put your name on the map. But don't take Killgrave lightly bec-
*Valour stops and looks directly into the camera.*
Angelo Valour: Is that a camera? Are you recording this you little-
*Valour reaches over the desk at him and the shot cuts to static. The scene comes back to Starr smirking.*
Brett Starr: Did you hear that? I have a bright future in this business. That is why he didn't rip up the contract right after he found the camera. Or at least that is what he told me. But either way, it doesn't matter. This week you are facing THE FUTURE OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING!
The future is bright and the future starts right now Killgrave. You? Your time is done. I'm going kick your ass this week and I am going to send you home with your tail tucked between your legs! You are nothing but a roided out freak who can't even carry my jock! I'm going to embarrass you out there in that ring and have a massive grin on my face as I do it.
This week I bury the bones of an ancient time and then I'll piss all over the grave. Brett Starr is the future of the business and Killgrave is going to serve as the foundation to my greatness. Beating you will child's play. I mean, we all know you aren't the smartest cookie in the locker room. Heck, look at that idiotic tribal tattoo on your arm. If that isn't a major red flag regarding your decision making, I don't know what is!
*Starr smirks and chuckles.*
Brett Starr: Killgrave. Enjoy your last few days of relevance here in Canadian X Pro Wrestling because after I beat you it's going to be a very quick and sad trip out the door. Sorry bro, it's just business. And it's just the way it is. Now if you excuse me...
*Starr leans back and puts his hands behind his head and closes his eyes as he smiles and soaks in the sun.*
Brett Starr: I have to look good for my adoring public. See you next week bud. I'll be the one kicking your ass in that ring.
*Starr laughs as the screen fades out.*
Brett Starr: Ladies and gentlemen of the Canadian X Pro Audience...I am very pleased to introduce you to the greatest wrestler the world has ever seen...
*Starr rotates the camera to a mirror that is hanging on the wall. Starr smirks and flexes the muscles on his free arm as he stands there is his bright pink speedo swimtrunks.*
Brett Starr: Me! Brett Starr!
*Brett Starr starts to make fake crowd going nuts sounds with his mouth.*
Brett Starr: BRETT STARR!!!!
*Brett starts to closes his eyes and spins around soaking in all the fans appreciation. Or at least the ones he hears in his own head. Brett starts a chant in hopes that "the crowd" will chime in.*
Brett Starr: Let's go Brett! Let's Go Brett! LET'S GO BRETT!
*The camera angle keeps spinning and it finds a blonde woman in her early twenties standing at the end of the hallway with her arms crossed and looking confused.*
Lindsey Starr: What are you doing, dumb ass?
*Brett stops suddenly and fumbles with the camera, almost dropping it on the ground.*
Lindsey Starr: And what did I tell you about wearing those ugly ass speedos? The last thing I want to see is my dip-shit brother wearing hot pink banana hammocks the first thing in the morning...Or any time in the day to be completely honest. It's already embarrassing enough to tell people that you are my brother.
Brett Starr: I-Well, uh....You could always tell them that your brother is the savior of the sport of professional wrestling! I mean, I am singlehandedly going up to Canada to save the sport in that country! You know they are always looking to America for handouts!
*Lindsey just shakes her head at his stupidity and turns to walk back to her bedroom.*
Lindsey Starr: Whatever...just keep it down. Some of us are still trying to sleep!
Brett Starr: I'm sure dad is proud of his baby girl sleeping until eleven AM on a Friday morning! Probably warms his heart!
*Lindsey keeps walking but calls back without missing a beat.*
Lindsey Starr: Probably as proud as he is in his deadbeat son who has invaded his pool house! Why don't you get an apartment or something?
*Brett turns the camera to his face that is red with embarrassment from that revelation being caught and he turns it off.*
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*The scene reopens with Brett Starr laying in the middle of an outdoor Olympic-sized pool on an inflate-able raft. The area is fenced in and palm trees are swaying as Starr is still rocking his hot pink speedos and a pair of black sunglasses. In his left hand he clutches an iPad that he is reading information off of.*
Brett Starr: So my opponent this week...The first man to fall to the greatness of Brett Starr is a man named Killgrave. Killgrave...the man who has a constant look of being constipated. I'm not sure I want to kick him in the gut because I am afraid of what will come out the back if I do...If you know what I am saying.
*Brett pulls his sunglasses down on the bridge of his nose.*
Brett Starr: CLEANUP...AISLE ONE!
*Brett chuckles at his own joke, which is good because there is no one else around (plus the fact that it wasn't that funny) before he pushes his glasses back up again and reads more into his opponent.*
Brett Starr: Killgrave has won 65 matches in his career! Damn, that is actually impressive if you remove the fact that none of them are against people of my caliber! Now I know what you are probably saying..."Brett, you haven't even had a match yet! How can you be so assured of your greatness when you have never been tested?"
First I would answer, Damn Dad! What don't you get off my back for a minute! Then I would say, don't you realize who I am? I am one of the greatest graduates of the Valour Training Academy! VALOUR...like our illustrious GM? That's right, he signed me because he saw that the sky was the limit for me!
I am a first round Hall of Famer...and I haven't even wrestled a match! I am a true prodigy and you all should be thanking the good lord above that you are getting the opportunity to see me wrestle my first match. For free none the less.
*Starr shakes his head and leans back further on the raft.*
Brett Starr: But back to the task at hand. Killgrave, my opponent has a lot of experience it seems. He has only lost five times and has only two draws. Which actually surprises me. When I see Killgrave I figured he is a huge draw. Flies must be drawn to him non-stop because he is so full of shit. Killgrave may have the look of a superstar but he doesn't have the talent and the charisma to pull it off.
When Killgrave comes out to the ring, all the fans promptly get up out of their seats and take the quickest route to the restroom, snack table or merchandise stands. But all of that changes in Halifax. Because he is facing the one and only, the always entertaining Highlight of any Night he is involved in, handsome, charismatic and just all around great guy Brett Starr!
*Starr smiles his million dollar smile after that statement before speaking again.*
Brett Starr: I have to admit that I am happy for Killgrave, for once he will actually get to wrestle in front of a captive audience. The only bad thing is everyone will finally be able to see what kind of crap sandwich he really is. But, that is not what I am here to talk about. Killgrave, I'm here to tell you exactly what is going to happen when we get in that ring.
*Brett takes off his sunglasses and tosses them behind him into the pool. Starr then closes the cover on his iPad and throws that into the pool as well, seemingly not caring that it will ruin the device completely.*
Brett Starr: I've heard all of the stories KG. I've heard that you have a problem with rookies. I mean, it's hard to miss it since it's right there in your damn bio on the website! Way to make yourself look like an asshole right off! That is really a good way to sell some of that merchandise!
But I'm here to tell you that it's alright you don't like me. I completely understand why you don't! Do you think that the dinosaurs liked the meteor that crashed into earth? Do you think the deer likes the hunter that shoots him? Do you think the antelope likes the lion that devours him? Of course not. You hate me and people like me...because you realize we are here to put you out of the business. Yeah, you have your spot. I'm sure Angelo blew all the smoke up your ass you could handle and sold you on how you will be a centerpiece of the company for the next few years and how he envisions you as the face of the future.
You know why I know that? Because he did the same to me. Don't believe me? Run the video!
*The scene fades into a hidden camera shot of Angelo Valour sitting behind his desk in his office. Starr seemingly has placed a camera on the lapel of his jacket without Valour's knowledge or permission.*
Angelo Valour: So Brett...This is a standard deal. You get paid per performance with an added bonus for every win you may have. If you are interested, we have a spot open on our debut card against Killgrave. I'm going to warn you, he is a great wrestler so you are going to have to bring it. But I've been keeping my eye on you for as long as you have been training at the academy and I think you have a bright future in this business. This is exactly the kind of match you need to put your name on the map. But don't take Killgrave lightly bec-
*Valour stops and looks directly into the camera.*
Angelo Valour: Is that a camera? Are you recording this you little-
*Valour reaches over the desk at him and the shot cuts to static. The scene comes back to Starr smirking.*
Brett Starr: Did you hear that? I have a bright future in this business. That is why he didn't rip up the contract right after he found the camera. Or at least that is what he told me. But either way, it doesn't matter. This week you are facing THE FUTURE OF PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING!
The future is bright and the future starts right now Killgrave. You? Your time is done. I'm going kick your ass this week and I am going to send you home with your tail tucked between your legs! You are nothing but a roided out freak who can't even carry my jock! I'm going to embarrass you out there in that ring and have a massive grin on my face as I do it.
This week I bury the bones of an ancient time and then I'll piss all over the grave. Brett Starr is the future of the business and Killgrave is going to serve as the foundation to my greatness. Beating you will child's play. I mean, we all know you aren't the smartest cookie in the locker room. Heck, look at that idiotic tribal tattoo on your arm. If that isn't a major red flag regarding your decision making, I don't know what is!
*Starr smirks and chuckles.*
Brett Starr: Killgrave. Enjoy your last few days of relevance here in Canadian X Pro Wrestling because after I beat you it's going to be a very quick and sad trip out the door. Sorry bro, it's just business. And it's just the way it is. Now if you excuse me...
*Starr leans back and puts his hands behind his head and closes his eyes as he smiles and soaks in the sun.*
Brett Starr: I have to look good for my adoring public. See you next week bud. I'll be the one kicking your ass in that ring.
*Starr laughs as the screen fades out.*
